We will be discussing both Session 4 and 5, Deepening My Relationships and Transforming My Experience. These are the notes for Session Four. I will post the notes for Session 5 shortly.The Me I Want To Be: Becoming God's Best Version of You by John Ortberg Session Four - Deepening My Relationships (Chapters 15 - 18)
Life giving relationships are important. We flourish the most when we are connected to God and His people. There are benefits to being connected. The author talks about the gifts of "connectedness."
1. Delight (By serving others, you are blessed)
2. Commitment (to community)
3. Love (opportunities to follow the Spirit's lead)
4. Joy (true, deep-in-the-soul richness)
5. Belonging (through God's grace)
Questions to Consider
1. The three "laws" of relationships are observation, observation, observation. What does it do to your spirit when someone truly notices or remembers something about you. How do you feel when you received a gift that shows that the person has been really paying attention to you and your needs--or when someone does something for you because they have observed a need?
There is a old saying that says, it is good to give when asked, it is better to give unasked through understanding.
2. In deepening our relationships, what can we do to increase our observation skills? How does it change your focus when you begin to observe others more deeply?
On a four step scale, between languishing and flourishing, where do you place yourself on connectedness to God and his people?
3. Why is commitment to community so important to our spiritual lives? Do you think it is important that the church get "community" right?
4. Describe how you received the gift of love from someone this week. Now describe one specific way you gave the gift of love to someone this week. Looking back on the past week, did you miss any opportunities to love? How did you feel?
5. Why do you think people work so hard at a sense of belonging to something? The desire to belong even plays out negatively as in a young person joining a gang. Is there anyone who desires the gift of belonging from you? If yes and you have not connected with them, what is stopping you?
Scriptures to Consider
1. Ephesians 3:14-20
What does Paul instruction followers of Christ to be rooted in? How can we grow our spiritual roots?
2. Hebrews 10:24-25
What are the benefits of regularly being together with other believers?
3. Romans 12:9-10
How can loving someone help you experience love? How do you change when you love people?
4. Nehemiah 8:10 and Psalm 90:24
Why does joy matter in our lives based on these scriptures?
Exercises to Consider
Answer the following questions for the Connectedness Inventory from the book.
1. When something goes wrong, do I have at least one friend I can easily talk with about it?
2. Do I have a friend I can drop in on at any time without calling ahead?
3. Is there someone who could accurately name my biggest fears and temptations?
4. Do I have one or more friends whom I meet regularly?
5. Do I have a friend I know well enough to trust their confidentiality?
6. If I received good new like a promotion, do I have a friend I would call immediately just to let them know?
Take some time right now to talk with God about your current and potential relationships. Is God moving on you to do something with one of those friendships?
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